Jacob’s Mini Cheddars Bangin’ Cheese Burger Flavour

Oh deary me. I was hoping that this Mini Cheddars flavour was going to be a banging (or bangin’ - which I really would prefer not to say) cheeseburger flavour. But I think it’s more about the cheese than the burger. Hmmm. They’ve created a range that celebrates foods that would be nothing without cheese. Which is not how I think about a cheeseburger. 

And on reading the list of ingredients it looks as though this crispy snack ought to be vegetarian, but I can’t find anything on the packaging to tell me if that’s the case. It does say that “no burgers have been flipped in the making of this product” and “flavouring only” but even though I can’t find any meat products in the list, I still can’t find any veggie label on the packaging. Odd.

The usual small round biscuits, crunchy and tasting of cheese… and smoky (possibly flame grilled?) flavour.

Unfortunately this crispy snack absolutely does not taste of cheeseburgers. You can only imagine how disappointing that is for me.

I couldn’t find this snack on the Jacob’s website so perhaps it is no longer available in actual shops. So thanks to a well known online purveyor of practically everything.

Lay’s Balenciaga flavour clutch bag

Many thanks to Beth Eats Chips on Instagram for alerting me to the fabulous Lay’s Chips x Balenciaga colab (or vice versa), if that’s what it is, recently featured at Paris Fashion Week.

I have looked at the Balenciaga website and I can’t see any signs that you can actually buy these fabulous crisp-bag bags yet - but here’s what you need to know. Because don’t we all have $1,500 to spare. But what a gorgeous design. Something to lust after. And then buy a packet of crisps instead.

Maybe Lay’s could bring out a Balenciaga flavour crisp? Smelling of leather? Hmmn. For real people like me who can’t even contemplate paying that much for a bag, let’s pick up a bag of crisps.

Cheese Balls by Sainsburys

 

I was hoping that this big bag of Cheese Balls might be like Cheese Footballs. But no. 

I was doing jury service opposite a large branch of Sainsburys and I pottered about the shop looking for something interesting. Actually, the court sent me (and nearly everyone else) home after only two days so I didn’t have much opportunity to forage for crispy snacks.

Anyway, this snack is sadly nothing at all like a Cheese Football. It’s dry. It gums itself to the roof of your mouth and all over your teeth. I don’t fancy trying it again. That’s a pity.

Bret’s Saveur Bleu Pancetta

 

Interesting. I first bought a packet of Bret’s crisps in 2013 and they were fabriqué dans le Morbihan (which is in Brittany),  then they were produit en Bretagne (which is Brittany) and then they became le chipsier français, and somewhere along the line they lost an apostrophe. So you can tell the reluctant taste testers and I have tried quite a lot of their catalogue.

I was rather pleased to find a brand-new-to-me crisp flavour. Blue cheese and pancetta eh? We’ll give that a go.

Unfortunately I thought these crisps quite disgusting. Blue cheese crisps might be OK; pancetta crisps could be tasty. But not both at once. No. The blue cheese taste is certainly there but then the pancetta flavour leaps up and interferes. 

Cliffs of Moher taste tester was not impressed. Even the Chef who can pretty much be convinced to eat anything (and he did) opined that this crisp flavour is all wrong.

Sorry. But no. The crisps themselves are exemplary.

Rubio Pijo Patatas Fritas en Sartén Sabor Limon y Pimienta

We went to the rather wonderful Zentrum Paul Klee in Bern and after admiring some art (Paul Klee obviously, and some Bridget Riley), we sat down for a snackish style of lunch. And picked up these lovely crisps. 

What a lovely crisp! The lemon and pepper work perfectly together and the Chef and I snacked down the whole packet all too quickly. 

Quite a fine cut, a good bite and a great flavour. What more could you want? Well, perhaps it would be nice to find a shop where we could buy these Spanish crisps again.

Delicious!

Zentrum Paul Klee

Vico Extra Craquantes Nature

Another choice from a French motorway service station. They look kind of dull don’t they? And it’s true this simply salted crinkle cut crisp isn’t that exciting. But, it is a simple flavour extremely well executed.

Fabulous crunch, just the right amount of salt. Yum yum.

There really is nothing else to say, except if you like crunchy, salty crisps you will like these crisps.

Very simple. Very good.

Salty Dog Sea Salt

At last another chance to try a crisp from niche UK crisp company Salty Dog. I say niche because I have only ever seen their crisps for sale at Luton airport (which I have not passed through since August 2014) although it could be they are sold all over the place - just not in North London, or France or Switzerland where I do most of my crisp shopping.

Here we have the basic flavour: sea salt.

And? These are really good. A lovely texture with the skin left on for good looks and added taste, great crunch and just the right amount of saltiness. And a wonderfully old-fashioned - make that retro - taste of fried potatoes.

So many brands are keen to point out that their crisps are baked not fried for a healthier crisp. I'm sure I've said it before but I'm going to say it again; the secret to a healthy lifestyle isn't to eat baked potato crisps rather than fried but not to eat crisps at all. Too much salt, too much fat, and in many cases far too much sugar do not a healthy snack make.

However, some of us just love crisps. So the answer is not to eat too many. And luckily for us Salty Dog have put their crisps in a sensibly small 40g packet. But still, I'm going to share with the Chef to make sure I don't overdose on the first day of my holiday. Because (oh dear) I managed to buy 6 packets of crisps at Luton airport and another on the plane!

I'm not sure these crisps quite reach the summit of fabulousness but they certainly get way past base camp and some distance up the mountain. And I do love the little dog on the packet.

Update: I discovered yesterday (7 July 2022) that you can buy Salty Dog crisps on La Suisse, a Belle Époque paddle steamer, on Lake Geneva. Which probably means you can get them on other boats in the CGN fleet. Still a very tasty crisp.

Originally published on 12 March 2015.

Co-op Naturaplan Chips Herbes des Alpes

Made for the Co-op by Swiss crisp giant Zweifel; this packet of gluten free, suitable for vegans crisps looks about as healthy as a packet of crisps can get. Unless you bake them instead of frying which obviously means it’s not a proper crisp.

For myself, these crisps seem extremely herby; there’s a bit too much taste. The Chef , on the other hand, thinks there isn’t enough flavour. Apparently you can’t please everyone. A good thin crisp with a light crunch.

Lu Tuc Goût Crème-Oignon

 

Snatched enthusiastically from the shelf of a large Co-op in Switzerland and eaten greedily almost in one sitting, this is a terrific crispy snack if you can find it. 

Ordinary everyday Tuc is a perfectly pleasant slightly crumbly salty biscuitty snack. Sour cream and onion flavour Tuc takes you to a whole new level of flavour and yumminess. Very nice indeed.

The biscuits are, as usual, oblong with cut off corners. See if you can stop yourself eating a whole packet at once… Go on… 

No idea at all where these are manufactured. Mondelez operate all over the place, so who knows.

Really delicious.

Also available in France. Still delicious.

Howdah Onion Bhaji

I really wanted to like this Onion Bhaji crispy snack. 

I love the vibrant yellow packaging with the elephant and I love that the company funds a free school meal for a child in India for every packet sold (you can read more about that at Howdah Snacks, and take a look at their great tea towels while you’re visiting). I quite liked the spicy flavour too. But sadly the texture is not for me. It’s not the crispy snack I was expecting; more of a biscuit. Kind of. The bite is too dull and I like my snacks to be crisp and crunchy. 

It’s at times like these that I miss the reluctant taste testers because we all had different likes and dislikes.  Don’t pay any attention to what textures I enjoy - or don’t.

I found several Howdah crispy snacks at a great big Sainsburys opposite the court where I was doing jury service.